THE BLACK WATER VAMPIRE (2014) Review

       Being a proponent of found footage films, I am always looking for that diamond in the rough, that one that you can shove into the faces of all the subgenre haters in hopes to sway their opinions. That’s exactly what I was hoping for when I sat down to watch The Black Water Vampire. Once again, my beloved found footage brethren have let me down. The first two thirds of the film are so tedious and drawn out, it’s like the writer had nothing written except for the ending, and just decided to wing it until then. That might make you believe that maybe the final third of the film was worth sitting through the prior right? Unfortunately you would be wrong.

     
       We start with the found footage clichés right from the beginning; we are shown police footage of a crime scene where a young girl’s body is found after she had been missing for two weeks. We soon find out that this is not a new incident for the town of Black Water, West Virginia. Over the last forty years, four women have been found dead in the woods, all of whom presumed murdered by a man named Raymond Banks.

     
       Documentarian Danielle Mason decides to investigate the killings and brings a crew of three to help her in her

journey. Danielle believes Banks is innocent and wants to prove that something more sinister is in the woods killing these young women.

     
       Usually when horror films like this start out slow, there are two general reasons: one is that the writer and director are looking to get their audience invested in their characters, or two, the writer is not very good and the director leans on the found footage aspect to carry the film to the climax. It’s pretty evident from the get-go that The Black Water Vampire falls victim to the second scenario. From the over-use of the classic jump scares, to the very familiar tent shaking and noises coming from just beyond eyesight, we aren't presented with anything new to the genre.

   
        Unfortunately it’s time to throw this lackluster found footage entry into the disappointing pile that horror fans are starting to watch grow at an overwhelming rate. Can someone please help save this dying subgenre that was once so unique and thrilling? Looks like we are going to have to wait until the next one with crossed fingers and pray that it’s not as poorly made and cliché ridden as The Black Water Vampire.

How a Night of Horror Changed My Life

               I remember back when I was eight years old. My movies of choice were PG comedies and animated classics. I had heard of horror movies but never thought twice about it, given the fact that I knew I'd never get to watch one at that age. A few years passed by and I had seen some "scary" movies but nothing that would be nightmare inducing. That all changed the night I talked my dad into letting me stay up until midnight to watch Friday the 13th Part 2.

               I had no idea what I was getting into but I KNEW I had to see it. The darkness of the night rolled around and by 11 I was getting real tired, for I was never allowed to stay up so late for anything, much less to watch a horror flick. I'm pretty sure my dad agreed to let me stay up so late knowing that I would never make it to midnight, but I was determined. Midnight had finally arrived, I was finally going to watch this mysterious movie that everyone had been talking about. By that time, everyone had gone to bed. There I was, a bright eyed, bushy tailed kid about to watch a movie that would change my entire life.
              The movie came to an end. I had made it through the whole thing and I loved it. I loved it so much but I was scared to death. I'm talkin' so scared that I wanted every light on in the entire house, and there was no way I was sleeping that night. After an entire evening of worrying about a man with a bag on his head stepping out of my closet, therefore ending my unaccomplished, unfulfilled life early, I wanted more.
               Ever since that terrifying night, I have been obsessed with everything horror. The idea of being frightened by fictional characters dead set on destroying everything and everyone in their path still excites me every day. Who knows where I would be without that night. One thing I know for sure is that I wouldn't be here right now writing this. Thank you horror, and may you continue to change lives by scaring the shit out of kids who take that brave plunge into your universe.

NURSE 3D (2013) Review

Nurse 3D- 3.5/5 Stars

       It's been a while since I've seen a good campy film like this one. Let me start by saying that if you take this movie too seriously, you are going to hate it and probably wonder if I should have my head checked.
     
With that said, let's start with our lead actress, Paz de la Huerta. Paz plays Abby, an extremely attractive, smooth talking, provocative dressed nurse by day, and one crazy ass femme fatale by night. Right away we are thrown into her crazy world as she lures her first unsuspecting victim into her clutches. Abby doesn't like unfaithful men and takes it upon herself to make sure they never hurt their innocent families again. Sounds like a nice lady right? Not so fast.

       Our vigilante femme fatale soon feels her master plan is threatened by a new young nurse named Danni, played by Katrina Bowden (Tucker & Dale vs. Evil), and she is not going to let her ruin it. What follows is a film filled with strong sexuality, violence, copious amounts of nudity, and a very clear message that it believes most men are pigs.
       
       Nurse is sure to split the crowd between the people that can appreciate a movie that doesn't take itself seriously, and the people that just think the whole thing was a waste of their time. I have seen the rating on IMDB drop almost two full points in just four days, so I'm guessing a lot of people aren't going to agree with my love of this truly odd medical murder mystery.
                 
       If you are a fan of films like Single White Female or Swimfan, I would urge you to give this one a shot. There are worse ways you could spend 84 minutes on the couch. The only complaint I have with this film is that the violence was mainly filmed with graphics meant for 3D, so when watching in 2D, it makes it look awful.
     
       Other than to not take this too seriously, my only suggestion to you is to make sure the kids are in bed and for god sakes, do NOT watch this with your parents! Now available via VOD, Nurse 3D gets 3.5/5 Stars in my book. Enjoy!

CURSE OF CHUCKY (2013) Review

Curse of Chucky- 3.5/5

       He's baaaack! After a nine year hiatus, that little red-headed psychopathic doll is back, and he's not in the laughing mood. Director Don Mancini, who has written or co-written every film in the Child's Play series to date brings us back to the no holds barred Chucky we all fell in love with. Unlike the last few entries in the series, Curse doesn't dabble in very much silly humor and seems to take itself rather seriously. 

                   
       We start the film with a woman who is caring for her disabled daughter Nica. She receives the Chucky doll anonymously on her doorstep. Soon after, she mysteriously dies, which leaves Nica suspecting foul play. The rest of the family soon arrives, each looking to take the beautiful Victorian mansion for themselves. This is when all the fun really gets going. From plot twists, to some creative kill scenes, to some seriously creepy moments, Curse of Chucky reminds us that a doll wielding a knife can be terrifying.

                   
       Fans of the first three are most likely going to enjoy this new entry the most. If you are one that looks for more of the comedic approach to Chucky and enjoyed the Bride and Seed films more, this one might not be exactly what you were hoping for when you heard it was being made. Either way, this could have been a total disaster, given the lengthy hiatus between films and the straight-to-video release, but it wasn't; In fact I had a lot of fun with it.

                   
       It looks like we will probably see more of these in the near future given the relative success of this one. Bring it on I say! Curse of Chucky gets 3.5/5 Stars in my book.

GRAND PIANO (2013) Review

Grand Piano- 4/5 Stars

       "The audience is in control right now, and I am your audience." Director Eugenio Mira brings us a beautiful new thriller starring Elijah Wood and John Cusack. We follow Tom Selznick (Wood), an extraordinary pianist on the eve of what seems to be a very important concert. Tom appears to be quite nervous and we soon find out that he has every reason to be; 5 years ago he succumbed to stage fright in front of a very large audience. This will be the first time playing in front of people since the incident. The concert starts and everything seems to be going well; The stage fright is in check and he seems to be hitting every note with ease. That is until he notices unusual red writing in his sheet music. "Play one wrong note and you DIE." From here we are led on a nail-biting, Hitchcock-like experience that is sure to leave its audience with accelerated heart beats and fulfilled expectations.

                 
       Anchored by a tremendous performance by Wood and absolutely beautiful direction by Mira, Grand Piano is one hell of an experience. The banter between Wood and Cusack mixed with the fast paced, perfectly written orchestra music works on every level. 

                 
       I would strongly recommend this to anyone that enjoys a good thriller or just anyone who can appreciate beautiful music mixed with flawless cinematography. Grand Piano gets 4/5 stars in my book and is now available On Demand. Pour a glass of wine, light the fireplace, and settle in for this exhilarating thrill ride.

HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET (2012) Review

House at the End of the Street- 2.5/5 Stars

Director Mark Tonderai brings us House at the End of the Street, a surprisingly decent little horror/thriller flick starring the beautiful and talented Jennifer Lawrence from the Hunger Games movies. The film starts out pretty dark, laying down the tragic backstory that the rest of the movie follows. From there we are introduced to Lawrence’s character Elissa and her mom as they move in next door to the house that the previously mentioned tragedy occurred. Everything is going perfect, until a light in the scary old house next door turns on in the middle of the night. After asking around, we learn that Ryan, the son from the previous family, has moved into the house and for some reason every single person in the town hates him. Not just kind of hates him, like wants to beat him to death and burn his house down hates him. As the movie goes along, Elissa starts to hang out with Ryan more and more, making her mom and the local high school douchebags very uneasy. But why? Ryan seems like such a nice guy. I’m sure he can’t be hiding any secrets right? 

 

House at the End of the Street is a love story wrapped in a murder mystery, wrapped in a psychological thriller. If you don’t mind every cliche in the book complete with jump scares, bumbling cops, and your inevitable plot twists, this might be for you. I will admit I hadn’t heard a lot of good things about this but I ended up coming out of it with appreciation for what it was trying to do. It’s not often that a good thriller with horror undertones does it for me anymore.    

Available for instant viewing on Netflix, you could do a lot worse if you are looking for a good way to spend an hour and a half on a dark snowy night. Just make sure the fire is up and the lights are low. House gets 2 ½ / 5 stars in my book. Enjoy!

THE CABIN IN THE WOODS (2012) Review

The Cabin in the Woods- 5/5 Stars

Director Drew Goddard teams up with writer Joss Whedon of Avengers fame to bring us one of the most entertaining horror movies to be released in years. Seen as a homage to all the classic horror films of the past, we are given a very familiar plot: Five friends head into the woods to stay in an old cabin where they plan to have some good old fashioned fun. Drugs, sex, alcohol, undead murderous rednecks … Ok, so maybe they didn't plan on the last one, but they get it whether they like it or not.              

                   With a great cast led by Chris Hemsworth (Thor) we follow the rambunctious group as they make every mistake that any horror fan knows you need to avoid when alone in the woods. Some mistakes seem so obvious either these kids really are that stupid or something else is going on, something far stranger than anyone could ever imagine.  
                   The Cabin in the Woods differentiates itself from your basic horror flick by the level of subtle (and at times not so subtle) comedy it produces . If you take this film more seriously than the writers did, you are going to be destined for a letdown. With an amazing plot, unbelievable special effects, some very original twists, and a great sense of humor, Cabin reminds us what it’s like to have fun at the movies again.  
                  Now available to watch on Netflix Instant, I would highly recommend this flick to anyone who will listen. Not only do I give this a rare perfect 5/5 stars, but it was in my top three best films of 2012. Enjoy!

                   

BIG BAD WOLVES (2014) Review

Big Bad Wolves- 3.5/5 Stars

       As a person who watches a lot of horror movies, sometimes I lose track of what the actual meaning of horror really is. Horror- "Intense fear: A very strong feeling of fear, shock, or disgust." Sometimes horror in films can actually be fun, oddly enough. Most of the time when we have fun in horror films, it is because we are watching unrealistic portrayals of crazy mutant killers or monsters that suck the brains out of characters we could never relate to.
                       
       Every once in a while, we get a "horror" film that genuinely fits the true definition. Big Bad Wolves, an Israeli film directed by Aharon Keshales and Navot Papushado is a truly horrifying film. The basic plot of the film is that in a small community, young girls are going missing and are later being found raped and murdered. One murder in particular leads three men on paths that will inevitably come to an explosive cross; A vigilante cop who will go to any length to find the killer, the father of the most recently found victim, and a schoolteacher that is the prime suspect of the murders.
                       
        I have to say, after watching this, I have a lot of mixed feelings as to how I felt about it. It's really hard to "enjoy" a film that has some very serious topics such as pedophilia, murder, and torture. I've seen films with these type of topics, but none that have taken this angle at them. At points I felt as though the directors were trying to mix in some very very dark comedy with some extremely serious scenes. I'm not sure if they were just trying to make the audience feel a little better about what they were watching, but it really came off as feeling more inappropriate than anything. Now, right along with some of my negative views of the film, there are definitely some great aspects; The cinematography is absolutely stunning, the music is surprisingly perfect, the story, although dark, is very well written, and the acting is scarily good.
                       
       It's going to be really hard for me to recommend this to many people I know, based solely on the topic at hand, but I do believe it is a good film. If you can handle the topics I have mentioned and don't mind subtitles, then I would say give it a shot, I'd love to hear what you think. Now available On Demand, Big Bad Wolves gets 3.5/5 Stars in my book. 

15 Good horror films currently on Netflix.

15 Good horror films currently on Netflix

1. Event Horizon (1997)- Sci-fi/Horror. Great little film with Sam Neil. If you like your horror in space, you might want to check this out.

2. Grabbers (2012)- Sci-fi/Horror/Comedy. Set in beautiful Ireland, a town is invaded by monsters/aliens and the only way to not get killed- get drunk!

3. House Of The Devil (2009)- Horror. This slow burner takes it's time to heat up, but has a tremendous payoff for the patient ones.

4. The Innkeepers (2011)- Thriller/Horror. Another slow burner by the same director as House of the Devil. If you like your ghost stories old fashioned, this is your jam.

5. Maniac (2013)- Horror. One of the best horror films of 2013. If you can handle a few ultra-violent scenes, Elijah Wood as a serial killer should fit your fancy.

6. Pontypool (2008)- Thriller/Horror- This one goes a different route than I've seen a lot of horror movies go. If you like your horror with a side of originality, this one's for you.

7. Resolution (2013)- Thriller/Horror- Another very original horror flick. This got a lot of praise last year and if you like your horror that makes you think, check this out.

8. The Host (2006)- Action/Sci-Fi/Horror- This is NOT the super shitty flick that came out in 2013. This is a Korean monster movie that took a lot of people by surprise. If you don't mind subtitles, this one is awesome.

9. The Bay (2012)- Thriller/Sci-Fi/Horror- This is a "found footage" flick about an ecological disaster off the east coast. Cool effects and a pretty good story.

10. Tremors II: Aftershocks (1996)- Action/Comedy/Horror- This sequel to the classic is fun for everyone. If you liked the original and haven't seen this, give it a watch.

11. V/H/S (2012)- Horror- This first installment is for any found footage lover like myself. Pay close attention to the first and last stories as they are the best.

12. V/H/S/2 (2013)- Horror- This second installment somewhat improves on the original. Again, this should be viewed by anyone that loves found footage horror. Safehaven and Slumber Party Alien Abduction are the two standouts.

13. All The Boys Love Mandy Lane (2013)- Mystery/Horror- This was one of my favorite horror films of 2013. If you like classic slasher flicks, this one should bring you back and make you happy.

14. [Rec]3 Genesis (2012) Horror- This third installment has as many haters as it has lovers. I am a lover. Found footage of a Spanish wedding that goes awry. Spanish subtitles warning. 

15. Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010)- Comedy/Horror- This hilarious gorefest about two very misunderstood backwoods hillbillies is a gem. If you don't mind your comedy with a heavy side of blood, this one is definitely for you.

Enjoy!

Top 10 Found Footage Horror Films.

Top 10 Found Footage Horror Films

In the wake of all the found footage craze, (and hate), I have seen more than my fair share. Now I know the majority of horror fans are sick of this subgenre, but I honestly cannot get enough. For some reason the shaky cam brings a special dimension to my favorite genre that I adore. Whether you're a lover or a hater, I have compiled a list of my ten favorites for you. Enjoy!

10. The Poughkeepsie Tapes (2007)

               I have to admit,this film made me feel quite uncomfortable. A lot of the films on this list follow the supernatural or mythical monsters, this follows a monster in the form of a human. The film brings us the story of an abandoned house in Poughkeepsie, NY which is searched and over 800 video tapes are found chronicling a serial killer's collection of murders.

9. Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)

                The Third installment of the well known franchise is the second best in the series, and arguably the only other good one besides the original. We follow Katie from the first film and her sister Kristi as children and their adventures befriending a malevolent spirit.

8. Troll Hunter (2010)

               When I first heard about this film, I couldn't wait to see it. The only thing I was worried about was that the CGI was going to turn an awesome idea into another SYFY channel piece of shit. Luckily I was wrong. The story follows a group of students as they travel to Norway to investigate a string of mysterious bear deaths when they stumble upon a much larger mystery being kept by a secret government agency.

7. Monsters (2010)

                This slow burner monster movie directed by the same guy that is bringing us Godzilla later this year is a very underrated film. The cinematography in this is absolutely amazing, and the limited amount of screen time of the monsters makes it all the more mysterious and intriguing. We follow a couple in Mexico following an alien invasion, as they make their way towards The United States, where safety lies.

6. Behind The Mask: The Rise Of Leslie Vernon (2006)

                    This tongue-in-cheek film uses the documentary style to give homage to horror with laughs and some shockingly disturbing content. Behind the Mask is a very unique idea turned into an amazing final product, and a must see for all die hard horror fans. A documentary crew is given the permission to follow Leslie Vernon, the next great horror icon, and film the behind-the-scenes of a serial killer.

5. [Rec] (2007) / Quarantine (2008)

                   I am kind if cheating here by putting both these films as my number five. I also am going to get some flack from true horror fans because [Rec] is almost unanimously viewed as the better film. For those of you who do not know, Quarantine is the English re-make of [Rec], which is a Spanish horror film. Now I do like [Rec] quite a bit better, but Quarantine is a very competent and terrifying re-make. Both films follow a reporter and her camera crew inside a building where they end up being trapped alongside the unthinkable.

4. Paranormal Activity (2007)

                   I remember back in 2007 when this movie was making noise all over the internet. I probably watched the trailer a hundred times and prayed that during it's initial limited release, that it would come to my town; And it did. I went and saw this with a half-full theater and it scared the living shit out of me. After I saw it, I came back to the same theater less than a week later and brought someone that had no idea what we were seeing. The film was now being played in the large theater and it was completely sold out. The girl I brought along basically told me she hated me halfway through the film as she was literally jumping out of her seat every five minutes. What an amazing experience. I hadn't seen a film do this to a crowd of people in a long long time, and I loved every minute of it. Now like I said earlier with number Three, this franchise definitely draws a large following of haters, and I don't understand. Maybe they didn't go see it in a packed theater, maybe they watched it in the middle of the day while sharing the experience with their Facebook app on their cell phone, MAYBE it just didn't work for them. Either way, I loved it and the experience it brought. If you don't know the plot by now... well, don't look it up and just watch...with the lights off.

3. The Blair Witch Project (1999)

                   I remember driving my mom crazy when this came out. I was fifteen and just one year away from getting my driver's license. I NEEDED to see this, and I NEEDED to see it the Friday it came out. After hours of begging and promises of the completion of many chores, she buckled and drove me to the theater. This was something I had never experienced before. My first found footage film, and at the time, I had no idea it was fake. This film began my love with the subgenre and I have never looked back. Hopefully most all of you have seen this, but I must say, the final shot in this film is one of the most terrifying moments in cinema history in my opinion. I still get the chills when I think about it..

2. V/H/S (2012) / V/H/S/2 (2013)

                       Yep, I'm cheating again. There is just no way to choose between these two films. I love the first one for it's originality, the payoff I got after impatiently waiting for what seemed like forever to see, and for the stories it told. The second one I loved for it's polished up look, for it's no holds barred approach, and again, for it's stories. I hold these films very highly when it not only comes to my favorite found footage films, but as two of my favorite horror films of all time. With the reports that these are going to keep coming, I hope they don't get lazy and  instead stay true to the awesomeness that these ended up becoming. My favorites are "Amateur Night" and "10/31/98" from the First, and "Safe Haven" and "Slumber Party Alien Abduction" from the Second.

1. Cloverfield (2008)

                         My favorite found footage film of all time (so far) is Cloverfield. This one had it all folks. First of all, the advertising for this film was ingenious. From the mysterious poster, to the extremely frustrating website, to the amazing job keeping the identity of the creature from the public, ultimately raising interest to an unheard of level. After all the hype and the anticipation, I could only be let down right? Wrong. This film in my opinion is near perfect. The characters were cast perfectly, the visuals were downright astonishing, and the monster was everything you could ask for. At this point, as much as I'd like to see a sequel or a prequel, I wouldn't be horribly bummed if it didn't happen. No need to taint the reputation of this film and give the haters a reason to bash it on social media. Cloverfield is the model for what found footage directors should strive towards, and it will be revered as a classic until a monster takes over our planet.

Eli Roth produced CLOWN releases horrifying trailer.

       Do clowns freak you out? Well if they do, I can bet that either you are going to avoid this movie like the plague, or you are like me and hope that it will play on your childhood fears and scare the hell out of you. Either way, the new trailer we are given is one hell of a preview. IMDB gives us a short summary of the upcoming film Clown- "A Loving father finds a clown suit for his son's birthday, only to realize the suit is part of an evil curse that turns its wearer into a killer."
                     
       What's funny is I remember seeing a trailer with this same idea a few years back that even had Eli Roth's name attached to it. The trailer ended up being fake and Roth hadn't seen it nor did he even know anything about it. Fast forward a few years later after Roth viewed and loved the faux trailer, and we are in business. Roth produces the new nightmare directed by Jon Watts (the original mastermind behind the faux trailer). I'll post both trailers below.

The "Faux" trailer-

And the actual one-

Enjoy!

PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE MARKED ONES (2013) Review

THE MARKED ONES- 2/5 STARS

                     
                         This morning I woke up a little later than usual. That usually happens when we get a dark and dreary day outside. I opened the blinds and there it was, one of the darkest, cloudiest days in over a month. Naturally, being the horror fan I am, the first thought that came to mind was "hmm, perfect day to see a good horror flick." Out of bed I jumped with my new found excitement for the day. "What shall I see today?"...god dammit... the ONLY horror film in theatres is "The Marked Ones."

                         Now I am not one to judge a film based on the recent reviews I've read, or even by the bad trailers I've seen, but I am one to pre-judge a film based on it predecessors. Lets be honest people, the last Paranormal Activity was horrible. Sure this one isn't technically a sequel, sure this one has changed from a suburban White family with kids, to a predominately Latino cast set in a middle-class neighborhood (at best), and sure we are given a pretty awesome poster. All that is great but can we really expect a whole new, more fresh film? Kinda.

                         "The Marked Ones" plays out a whole lot like all the other Paranormal Activities in the beginning. We are given a story that gives reason for our characters to be carrying around a camera, a few spooky characters, and random spooky happenings. Just like all the other films, things progressively start getting worse and worse. This is where we as an audience are led down a different path..kinda. 

                         Let me go ahead and tell you, even though I don't get spooked easily, I was in a big theatre all by myself, which should help in the venture to be scared right? Wrong. One of the most surprising things I found with "TMO" was the lack of scares. We are given a few small jump scares but nothing really terrifying except for a few scenes at the very end.

                         If you are looking for constant scares, a deep plot, and a nightmare inducing flick, I would recommend you look elsewhere. If you are looking to kill a short 84 minutes with a few scares and a decent pay-off, go check this out. "The Marked Ones" gets 2/5 Stars in my book.

"ANDREW'S ALL HALLOWS EVE"

Andrew's All Hallows Eve.

(A Short by ME)

            There was a certain chill in the air, the kind of chill that only comes once a year. It looked as if paint had spilled from the heavens and smothered the trees in a multi-colored blanket. The slight breeze was blowing down the quiet streets as the litter of candy wrappers rustled in the gutters. It was all Hallows Eve. Porches were occupied by the transparent bodies of skeletons and the evil grins of jack-o-lanterns. There were lawns that had become the temporary resting place for the dead and their tombstones. It was his favorite time of year. Halloween reminded Andrew of horror movies, eating unnecessary amounts of candy, dressing up and scaring his friends, and the feeling of joy he got when Monster Mash rang in his ears.

            Andrew was a real simple guy. He lived day to day in a cubicle, retired to his tiny apartment at night, and watched scary movies with his best friend in the world, Mr.Voorhees, his twenty pound orange tabby. Andrew didn’t have many friends. You see, it’s hard to connect with people and make new friends when your favorite things in life are disgusting monsters, blood sucking vampires, and flesh dripping zombies. He didn’t need friends though; he had John Carpenter, George Romero, and Tobe Hooper.    

With his windows open, and the cool fall breeze inflating the drapes as if they were ghosts floating through the apartment, Andrew anxiously awaited for the night. He loved the fact that one night a year, people enjoyed the same things he did. He could blend into the public without feeling like an oddball. “I wonder what I’ll do this year for Halloween,” Andrew thought out loud while staring at his dozens of horror themed posters that covered the old paint that was peeling on his walls. Last year he sat at home and enjoyed a 24 hour movie marathon of his favorite frightening flicks while watching the streets fill with ghouls and goblins, and gorging on an abundance of candy. Although that was an enjoyable way in his mind to spend Halloween, Andrew was looking for something more memorable, something that he would remember for the rest of his life.

GROOVIE GOOLIES

Recently, I Bought this little collection of one of my favorite cartoons of all time. Even though I wasn't born for more than ten years after the show was aired, I remember seeing re-runs as a kid. If you are looking for some good old fashioned ghoulish nostalgia, you can find this collection onAmazon or you can just head over to YouTube where you can find most of the episodes for free!  

OPEN GRAVE (2013) Review

Open Grave- 2.5/5 stars

                   What's worse than waking up in a muddy pit, feeling like shit, with amnesia? Waking up in a pit, feeling like shit, with amnesia, and surrounded by hundreds of dead bodies. Open Grave, directed by  Gonzalo Lopez-Gallego, the same guy that brought us the painfully dull Apollo 18, takes us on a mysterious ride-along with twists and turns galore. Our lead actor, Sharlto Copley (known for his role in District 9) is the man in the pit that we are introduced to in the beginning of the film. We follow his dazed and confused journey in the search for his identity and muddled past.

                   At points, I had a really hard time keeping up with the multitude of characters, the dozens and dozens of flashbacks, and the misleading revelations. The first act is OK, the second half is borderline painful, but luckily the third act is the one keeping this film from being a total loss. If you are willing to stick around for the hour and 40 minute run time, you'll be well rewarded with the final payoff.

                   I have to say that I most likely will not be recommending this to any of my friends any time soon, but that doesn't mean there aren't worse films out there. Open Grave gets 2.5/5 stars in my book.

Top 10 Films of 2013 (according to me)

Top 10 Films of 2013 (In no particular order)

Contracted-

             Directed by 25 year old Eric England, starring Najarra Townsend, Contracted is a story about a young girl who gets drugged and raped at a party by an unknown man (literally unknown. We the audience only get a few short glimpses of him, and when we do, his face is blurred.) Samantha (Najarra) soon finds out that her horrible incident is just the commencement of something beyond her worst nightmare.

             This movie was a late entry into my top 10 list this year. I had heard a few good things about it on some podcasts and finally decided to give it a watch. Boy am I glad that I did. Townsend is amazing as our beautiful and very unfortunate lead. Everything from the acting to the beautiful direction and camera work lands Contracted on my list as one of this year's best releases.

Dallas Buyers Club-

               Directed by Jean-Marc Vallee starring Matthew McConaughey and Jered Leto, Dallas Buyers Club is set in 1985 and follows the real life story of Ron Woodroof (McConaughey), a bull riding, whiskey drinking, heavy smoking straight mans-man who contracts the HIV virus in a time when most believed that only gay men were susceptible. Woodroof finds that drugs unapproved by the FDA are his best chances for a prolonged life, a way to help others in his situation, and a way to make some money.
               Let me start by saying that the acting in this movie by McConaughey and Leto are the two strongest performances by any two actors in any film this year. 68 pounds combined were shed by both actors to portray their ill characters. The story is beyond touching and the direction by Vallee is superb. My guess is you will hear a lot about this film come awards season. My genuine love for this film, it's story, and its characters portrayed lands Dallas Buyers Club on my top 10 this year.

Evil Dead-

               Fede Alvarez directs a surprisingly great cast lead by the beautiful Jane Levy (Suburgatory) in this "remake" or as I like to call it "re-imagining" of the classic 1981 film of the same name. As a huge horror fan, I was leary when I first heard that this movie was being made. Too many near perfect films have been unnecessarily remade lately. I give all the credit in the world to Alvarez for giving us a hell of a horror movie in his fresh new take on the classic. Whereas the 1981 film is successful in its campy, over the top comedy/horror, this version succeeds using a much darker angle with plenty of legit scares and gross-outs.

                The overall surprise on how well this film was made mixed with the amazing acting by a cast of mostly unknowns, lands this film in my top 10 of the year.

Stoker-

                  Directed by Chan-wook Park, starring Mia Wasikowska, Nicole Kidman,and Matthew Goode, Stoker may be the most beautifully shot film in my list this year. Park (known for his popular Korean film Oldboy) delivers a gem in his first English-language film. We follow the life of India (Wasikowska) from the day of her fathers funeral. We can start to tell from our first introduction that something is different about India, and as we delve deeper into the film, we are clued in on what makes her unique. with it's slow burning story, extended camera stills, and and prolonged dialogue, Stoker may not be for everyone. I found that what some perceive as its downfalls, are actually its unique strengths. Pair those strengths with awe-inspiring performances by Wasikowska and Goode, as well as stunning cinematography, Stoker nestles itself among the other top 10 this year.

The Way Way Back-

                      Although I didn't rank any of my top 10 in any particular order, The Way Way Back would have to be my favorite movie of the year. Liam James plays 14 year old Duncan, a quiet kid on vacation with his mom and her new jerk-off boyfriend (played by Steve Carell). This movie has so many surprises as far as the acting goes, but all of them are overshadowed by that of Sam Rockwell. Rockwell plays the hilarious yet mysteriously affectionate owner of the local water park who takes Duncan under his wing. If you haven't seen this yet and you are looking for one good recommendation from this list, go watch this, you won't be let down.

You're Next-

                       From director Adam Wingard comes this home invasion film starring Sharni Vinson as the Erin, the girl with many secrets. There's not a lot I can say about this movie without giving a lot away so I'm going to keep it brief. You're Next has been circulating film festivals since 2011 and had a lot of buzz coming from the people lucky enough to see it. Finally released nationwide in 2013 I got to see it in theatres and the buzz was real. Beautiful cinematography, unique plot twists, and one incredible acting performance lands this movie on my top ten this year... easily.

Mud- 

                          Jeff Nichols (director of Take Shelter) brings us a film about friendship, mystery, crime, and love. Matthew McConaughey gives yet another amazing performance as Mud, the charming man on a mission who is living in a boat in a tree, searching for his true love. The real treat in this film is the performance by young Tye Sheridan as Ellis. Overall, everything about this movie works and should be viewed by anyone looking for something to watch with the family (grown up family).

Prince Avalanche-

                        This film was so much fun for me to watch. I am a huge Paul Rudd fan (shameless plug that he graduated from my high school- Shawnee Mission West). Rudd plays Alvin, one of his most interesting characters yet to date. Set in 1988, Rudd and Emile Hirsch play two road workers working in the middle of nowhere battling each other and ultimately themselves. The two characters have completely different personalities that somehow end up causing incredible chemistry. This surprising journey through friendships and inner demons lands a spot on my list.

The Conjuring-

                         I feel like this movie is on many people's top 10 this year, and chances are you've probably already seen it and have a strong opinion one way or another. I obviously loved this film by James Wan. With great performances by two of my favorite actors right now (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga) and beautiful cinematography mixed with genuine scares, The Conjuring is not only one of my favorite movies of the year, but a film that will be talked about and shown at sleep-over's for decades.

All The Boys Love Mandy Lane-

                           I had been waiting to see this movie FOREVER. Finally releasing nationwide after years and years of circulating the film fests, 'Mandy Lane, I have to say was well worth the wait. Beautiful lead Amber Heard plays Mandy, the girl are the boys want. A group of sexually promiscuous, heavy drinking, drug abusing teens escape to a house in the middle of nowhere for some good ole' fashioned fun, when things start to go wrong. I know what you're thinking.. "I've seen this movie a million times." Thats what I thought... With throwbacks galore to the classic slashers and a few twists and turns, Mandy Lane successfully caused me to join all the other boys, and fall in love.

Honorable Mentions- The Lords Of Salem, Spring Breakers, The Wolf Of Wall Street, Gravity, Grabbers, American Hustle, This Is The End.